Andrew’s FIRST day of Kindergarten (Aug. 22, 2011)

Last night Andrew had a hard time going to sleep because he was so EXCITED to start school today, but finally the morning came & Andrew was up early & ready to go to school. He was such a good boy & just got ready for school with no problems at all. Jon was a life saver & made Andrew’s lunch & got him all ready for school so I could get cleaned up b/c I had an ultrasound at 10 am in Round Rock.

Jon had to get to work so I took Andrew to school early & we just sat in the car & waited to be able to go into the school at 7:20 am. Finally the time arrived to walk up to the school doors & wait just a couple minutes outside before we could go into his classroom.

Andrew felt like such a BIG BOY wearing his backpack & going to school!!!

After I took Andrew’s picture he wanted to take mine & even though it didn’t really turn out great I wanted to include it b/c I thought that was so cute that he wanted to take my picture like it is my big day too, which I guess it actually was b/c I was putting my first baby into school & waiting for my other baby boy to come too.

Even though we had only been to Andrew’s class once before he remembered where it was & just walked right there. He was so excited to find his locker & then his seat. Mrs. Szymanski, his teacher, had a connect the dots paper on the desk for them to work on & he started on that right away too. WOW when did my first baby boy grow up?

After I said my goodbyes & gave kisses I was just going to leave but decided to go socialize & so I went to the “Kiss & Cry Room” they had set up in the library where the first time parents could go socialize & cry if they wanted to with other first time parents. I didn’t cry about Andrew going to Kindergarten but I was almost ready to cry about my other baby every time someone would ask me when I was due. On the outside I just laughed & tried to joke about it but on the inside I really was exhausted emotionally & ready to cry so I didn’t stay very long.

I got home & a good friend called me to ask how I was doing, & it actually was GREAT to talk to her & express some of what I really was feeling & get some support from her. Then I had to hurry to my ultrasound appointment in Round Rock to make sure everything was good with baby Jackson so off I went. Of course I got lost trying to find the place & my sweet husband helped me over the phone even though I was emotionally done after that but he just was way patient with me like always & just helped me out SO much. I really am so lucky to have him to go through this with b/c I couldn’t ask for a better husband & best friend to travel this journey with.

So I finally got to the ultrasound appointment & after they had checked the amniotic fluid level, baby Jackson's movements, his heart beat, & breathing muscles practicing they said that Jackson was doing great but that he was probably weighing about 9 lbs. 15 oz. not 8 lbs. like my midwives had been thinking & that his due date was Aug. 12th so that kind of worried me b/c Andrew was 9 lbs. 13 oz. & I didn’t want the baby to get so BIG that I would have complications during the labor & have to have a C-section.

After that I headed straight to my appointment with the midwife with what I felt like were real concerns that had viable proof from the ultrasound. They did the non-stress test & said everything looked great & that we just had to be patient which I was so sick & tired of hearing so I kind of started to express some of my concerns so Jean, the main midwife, came in with the other 2 midwives & started trying to talk me down or just to calm me down. When I brought up the fact that the ultrasound said my due date was Aug. 12 NOT 15th like they had thought from a really early ultrasound so I was really over due Jean came back with that ultrasounds aren’t as reliable the later you get in the pregnancy & then when I told them about the estimated size of the baby Jean came back again with that ultrasounds aren’t reliable & felt around & said she really thought this was a 8 lbs. plus baby but NOT almost 10 lbs. Well, I didn’t ask here all of my questions that I wanted to b/c I just felt kind of intimidated & stupid, but I did at least express enough of my concerns that Jean did loosen my membranes which she did but even then I was still upset so she gave me a castor oil shake recipe that might help induce labor naturally.

Well, needless to say I came home from the appointment just in tears & more upset & scared about not being able to have this baby soon & safely. Jon was so SWEET again & cancelled his coaching call for work so he could be home when I got home. He just listened to me & held me while I vented & cried. He also called Jean’s cell phone she had given me & left a message for her to call him back b/c he needed to ask her questions & needed some answers about what the plan was if the castor oil didn’t work. Then after he made sure I was okay he volunteered to go with me to pick up Andrew from school even though he really needed to get back to work. I was SO grateful for that kindness b/c I was emotionally just not up to doing it on my own, which I know sounds pathetic & it is but I was just emotionally EXHAUSTED & so even something as small as going to pick Andrew up from school seemed monumental & just too much.

Andrew was SO EXCITED when he saw daddy coming to pick him up & said he had a GREAT day at school & LOVED it!!! In fact he came home with this little paper saying he had a great day & also to ask him about the “Kissing Hand” story with his hand print on it & a heart sticker in the middle. So when we got home he told me the “Kissing Hand” story which his teacher had read to them which was about a little raccoon that didn’t want to go to school b/c he would miss his mom so his mom gave him a kiss on the palm & said that whenever he missed her he could put his palm to his cheek & it would be like she was giving him a kiss. I asked him if he wanted me to kiss his palm so when he missed me at school he could do that same thing too & he totally surprised me when he said “No, I’m okay. You can just give me a kiss before I go to school!” WOW my baby really has grown up!!!

After we had been home for a while & I had talked to my parents about what had gone on today with the midwives & at their encouragement I did call the birthing center back up & talked to one of the midwifes & told her how I was really feeling & that I was DONE EMOTIONALLY & wanted to be referred to an OB. We talked for quite a while & she was actually very kind & really listened to me so by the end of our conversation I was willing to do the castor oil shake but no matter if it worked or not I was going to come in at noon the next day & then we would discuss being referred to an OB. So I am cautiously hopeful that the castor oil shake will work but also feeling a little better knowing there is a Plan B & that no matter what I will get some relief at least emotionally tomorrow afternoon. Again my sweet husband is going to go with me so we can both get our questions answered & hopefully get a little peace about this whole situation too.

Well, the rest of the evening was pretty uneventful but I was okay with that b/c with such a crazy day I needed just a little sanity & peace.