Today Andrew didn’t have school so we spent the morning just hanging out but then we were going crazy & needed to get out of the house so we headed to Big Bounce! Andrew had A LOT of fun playing but Jackson didn’t really want to play in the little kids area & kept crying until I just let him go play in the big kids area & got in there with him to protect him! He just wanted to be with his big brother! Andrew was really good & even played with Jackson too!
Then we met Dad at the office at lunch time so I could go get my nails done & eyebrows waxed for our date tonight! I so enjoyed getting my nails done & even was adventurous & got a red color with sparkles. They turned out great but I forgot to take a pic! I have decided that I REALLY do LOVE having my nails look nice so I am going to go back in a couple weeks when they start wearing out & get them done again! There is something about having pretty nails even when you are changing a poopy diaper that just makes me HAPPY! Also I have been doing really good emotionally so I am going to counseling every other week now instead of every week so we have some extra money I can pamper myself with!
So after I got my nails done I was CRAZY & BRAVE & decided to go back to Big Bounce & let the kids play some more! After an hour or so we headed home so I could get all done up for my date tonight with Jon!
Then I again was crazy & instead of just getting ready I sat down & did a puzzle with Andrew b/c he really wanted me to! That is SO NOT like me b/c usually if I have something big coming up I am so up tight & impatient with the kids, but TODAY I did AWESOME!!! I wish I could be this way all the time but I guess I will just enjoy my good mommy days & work on my sad mommy days! After all that is why I am here on Earth is to be tested & a big part of my testing is learning how to be the kind of Mom I want to be & forgiving myself when I am not & then getting back up & trying again the next moment!
When I eventually did get ready I got all dolled up & even put my hair in hot curlers & was adventurous once again & wore my animal print top with RED lipstick! I felt very SEXY & CONFIDENT & dare I say even thought to myself, “Wow, Jon sure is going to have a HOT DATE tonight! What a lucky guy he is!”
It felt SO GOOD to FEEL that way but I need to remember that I can feel that way anytime even when I am in my PJs all day b/c it really comes from within NOT from my appearance although getting dolled up does help me!
After I got all dolled up I dropped the kids off at the babysitter’s house, Janine, & then met Jon at the office to start our date!
We didn’t have a lot of time before the play so we just went through the drive thru & grabbed some dinner & ate on the way to the Bass Concert Hall in downtown Austin where the Lion King play was being held!
The traffic was crazy & I was SO GLAD Jon was driving & not me b/c I was even freaking out just being a passenger! We eventually found a place to park & walked to the Bass Concert Hall! On our walk there I just remember looking up into the beautiful clear night sky with the BIG MOON & thinking, “I am so LUCKY!” I really do have the most amazing husband that spoils me & treats me like the QUEEN I can become! He was such a gentleman & opened the doors for me & held my hand & just made me feel SO SPECIAL like he always does!
WOW, is how I would describe the play…WOW!!! It was amazing & the music was phenomenal!!! I loved the music so much that at intermission we went & bought the CD b/c I wanted our kids to be able to enjoy it too & I wanted to be able to relive the magic too!
Also during the play I had a distinct impression that I really need to make sure that we offer our kids this kind of wholesome, uplifting entertainment & make sure that the media that enters our home gives me the same uplifting feeling that attending this play did!
Another spiritual teaching moment came when Simba was signing “Endless Night”
Even with all the thousands of people around me I was able to have a moment of understanding & clarity about my depression.
I realized that Simba was singing MY SONG & expressing exactly how I sometimes feel especially when I am depressed…ALONE!!! Then the chorus started & I just felt such a surge of HOPE & FAITH come over me…in fact I even started crying b/c the Spirit was SO STRONG.
The spirit was testifying to me that the night really will end (my deep despairing depression), that the sun will rise (my Savior has paid the price for me) & I will be able to hear HIS voice deep inside again. That is one thing that is really hard about my depression…I feel like I am being attacked spiritually & I can’t feel the peace the Spirit brings which is so essential for TRUE HAPPINESS!
I just felt so UPLIFTED & EMPOWERED & knew that no matter what happens I will be okay b/c my HEAVENLY FATHER LOVES ME & knows ME even though sometimes I can’t feel Him there!
( I hate that this picture turned out blurry but it is the only one we got so I included it anyway. It reminds me of the FUN time we had together & that is all that matters!)
We enjoyed going to the play together so much that we have decided that it needs to become a tradition for Jon to give me play tickets for my Christmas present every year & then go around Valentine’s Day! (Last year we went to Les Miserable!…YES I really am SPOILED!!!)
THANK YOU again Janine for watching our kids for us! You are the best friend to have!
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